Night came too quickly for us. The sun set in a blaze of fire leading to a cool crisp night. The beauty of the stars was something rare for us yet here with the fenced in yard we seemed safe. Safe enough where when night fell on us, we sat under the stars. I kept the door unlocked and brought broken up pieces of wood and lit a nice fire for everyone. I always loved nights like this. There was not a cloud in the sky and each star shimmered and sparkled above the fire that danced and twinkled in a heated exchange of light and sounds of crackling wood. I was probably a pyromaniac when I was little. Crickets whispered to each other in the distance. It was calming and beautiful.
Slowly one by one the group came out and pulled up plastic chairs around the fire. It was the first time we relaxed as a group. Personally I think that there is no better way to relax than by fire.
"So Sam," Matt started off the conversation "How many animals do we have?" Today I counted the animals and separated them into neutered and not neutered.
"We have about 150 animals overall" I started us off. "103 dogs and 47 cats." Everyone smiled but it was a bit too early, "Unfortunately only 30 dogs are not spayed or neutered and only 14 cats." This is a huge problem. We have food but it is not recurring.
"Wait Sam, why is that so bad?" Sean naïvely questioned.
"We need to eat, Sean." Freddie remarked "If a dog is not neutered, then we can not breed it with other dogs and they will be a bit of a waste." Freddie was right. I love that about him. Although there are things he does not know there are a lot of things he does. When Freddie knows something he knows it really well.
"Wait, Sam we can not eat dogs and cats!" Nicole shouts. "They are pets"
"They are unfortunately food" Freddie remarked. Nicole shot him a glare that sent chills down my spine and it was not even directed at me.
"Sam, you can't expect us to eat pets." Sean seemed to be panicking. I chose to keep quiet and watch the fire gracefully dance in a burning tango that licked your face with heat. We did need to eat and I knew that we might not all be happy with how but it was what it was. Life is hard and these dogs would all die without us anyway. I would much rather have they feed us than the Infected. Around me the argument breaks and grows feeding the flames with all important oxygen. I just sat there quietly watching people take sides split up and battle it out. Personally I was not in favor of killing animals. I mean honestly, I love animals; more than people most times. I mean I did bring my own pets.
However, I am also in favor of survival. Unfortunately that means doing something that I am not proud of. I will eat an animal to survive. I will survive.
"Sam!" Nicole forces me back into the argument, "We will not eat dogs!" her voice echoes into the trees disappearing into the dark night.
"Then you won't." I smile at her.
"See Freddie," Nicole grins with some unwarranted idea of self-satisfaction. "Sam is not going to eat anyone's pet."
"Wait, I never said that." The smile on Nicole's face dropped and her head creaked back my way. "I said that you won't if you don't want to. Then you won't eat I guess." The whole group became silent. Their eyes all focused on me. I just sat and watched the fire crackle and spark in the air. "I plan on surviving." My voice is just loud enough for everyone to hear. "Sometimes that means doing something I am not proud of, if you don't want to eat one of the animals then fine don't, but I will." I think my point was made because everyone else just sat there and stared at the fire.
It was tough picking a dog. They were all cute, but I had to be logical about it. The dog could not be too small or too big. Either there will not be enough or there may be too much left over to bring the Infected towards us. I want a neutered dog. This will not kill our population in the long run. Walking through the kennel I felt a sick pain go through my stomach. I could not kill these things. They were cute and I had known a lot of them from when I worked here. I decided on an American Eskimo Dog. His tag said "Snowball: If found please call 7325398756" Snowball was not too small his long white hair stood up on end making him this little puffball with a head that stuck out. He had dark brown eyes and black lips that seemed to be smiling at me. He was my pick.
I opened up the cage and brought the dog outside to the fire. Everyone stood there eyes locked on this dog. He wagged his tail and smiled. I felt my stomach churn and burn. He was a cute innocent animal. "So who is going to do it?" I mutter under my breath. There was an unsaid consensus that no one wanted to do it, not even Freddie who had fought for the cause just a moment ago. Eyes slowly gazed at one another; each of us wondered who would step up. All eyes converged onto Freddie. He looked up and saw he had no choice in the matter and conceded.
"How will I kill the thing?" With in second my bag of knives was outside. Freddie Matt and I perused through the thing, pulling out knives.
"Hey!!" Freddie suddenly gasped "How about this thing" In his hand was the thing of nightmares, mine to be exact. In his hand was a meat cleaver, the blade sat at an even seven inches, and its light brown wooden handle had a few stains of blood splattered across it. Images scrape across my mind creating a slow motion video which shows the image of my parents' death at the hands of a monster. The weapon is evil, a living breathing creature of death. Its shadow haunted my nightmares.
"You can not use that!!" I slapped the demon out of Freddie's hand. The blade falls to the ground with a slight ringing of the blade. Freddie and Matt looked at me like I was crazy. I awkwardly smiled and gave a slightly heavy breath. "What if that blade does not split the vertebra, the poor dog will die in lots of pain." I lied, that had nothing to do with why I did not want them using that meat cleaver, but they bought it none the less. "How about this one?" I hold up a large butcher's knife with a sharp point. Its bright metal shines under the light of the flame. "You can easily snap the vertebra between the tip of the blade." I handed Freddie the large knife. He eyed the thing like some strange new thing. His hand grips the hilt of the knife twisting the blade trying to get a good look at it.
He looked down at Snowball who is sitting watching him with his tail still wagging and tongue hanging out from his mouth. Snowball seemed happy. I held him still as Freddie jabbed the blade into the back of the creature's neck. The red blood began to flow freely across the bright white fur staining it forever. I felt my stomach churn; I am going to throw up. I can feel it rolling up my throat. I dropped the dog and ran into the far corner of the backyard. I threw up in front of everyone, all over the grass. My body trembled and shook. I turned around and looked at the group. They were all still watching Freddie as he clumsily skinned and gutted this animal. I did not watch. I could not bring myself to do it.
After all was said and done we cooked the meat over the fire. Matt threw the skin and other uneatables into the fire. It would get rid of them without drawing the infected in. We all sat around the fire ate and joked, even Nicole ate. Smiles and laughing lit up the night sky. It was honestly wonderful. As the night rolled on and the fire began to dim I noticed something that for me was disheartening to say the least. Freddie and Sarah were sitting close holding each other tightly, even Matt and Nicole had some form of intimacy as they slowly brushed hands. Who did I have; no one I sat alone and watched my plate. I looked up at Ackerman who was still obliviously eating.
"Hey Ackerman, want some pork?" I chuckled at my awkward joke. No one was amused. Pigs were something that we rarely talked about and even I found that joke to be in poor taste. Pigs were the reason we were in this predicament. I take that back humans were the real reason we were here, but pigs were how the Infection spread.
People liked to eat pig; it was the third most consumed meat before the Infection broke out. Pigs were fatty and people did not like that. They did not want any guilt. That is the American way I guess. Rather than change the way they eat or how they live, people wanted to change the food itself. So scientist began genetically altering pigs. Not in major ways. They just wanted to make them leaner, healthier meat. The meat was healthier and people could eat more and there was no guilt.
There were side effects. The destruction of the fat tissues also affected there ability to control there metabolism. The poor creatures could not survive for more than a few years. That was fine though, they only needed a few years before they were slaughtered. The pigs were slow moving and weak, their bodies lumbered listlessly without life or care. Worst of all changes the pigs had a very weak immune system. They tried to overcome this problem with tons of vaccines and antibiotics, but that only made them slower and weaker. These poor things were a sign of the destructive power of man. Yet it seemed not a single person cared. They got their food and there was no guilt.
There was also no sign of the worst thing imaginable living inside these poor creatures. Carnecomiendus, a virus that attacks the brain. It lived in a dormant state inside of the pigs, yet when consumed by humans the virus came to life. It went after several parts of the brain. The virus started with the frontal lobe. It hit like a lobotomy with teeth. The Frontal lobe controlled your ability to make decisions. Without it, nothing is right, and nothing is wrong. The perfect killer, no thoughts, no remorse. The next thing that the virus went after was a small part of the brain called the hypothalamus. Destroying destroys the ability to get full. You will always be hungry. All you know is to feed, on anything. The virus had control and there was nothing you could do but succumb to the pain and become a zombie. It is a horrible painful process as the disease slowly takes over your muscles and tests them out. The result, a large majority of people, no not people; things walking around aimlessly on the hunt for food.
I looked around at the group. There seemed to be an awkward silence in the air.
"So," Matt groaned a loud and obviously fake yawn. "I think it is late and we all need some sleep." He got up and stretched his arms letting out another fake yawn in the process. "Goodnight guys" he smiled as he helped Nicole up from her chair as well.
"Goodnight" She echoed as they walked inside. My eyes caught Sarah's who suddenly rose from her seat.
"Freddie and I are going to call it a night as well." She pulled Freddie up as they also walked into the hospital. Sean and I sat there in the heat of the fire in silence. It was the most awkward silence of our lives. Neither of us wanted to say anything but we both knew something needed to be said.
"Well Sam," Sean's voice awkwardly cracked "I guess it is just you and me here." He looked at me and smiled this halfhearted fake smile. Sean was not the kind of person to just leave someone alone when they are clearly hurting. It was never in his nature. He cared too much.
"Just go to bed Sean, I am fine." In a heartbeat he was gone. I sat there alone and watched the fire dance and crackle in an extravagant display of grace and power. It honestly was a beautiful night, zombies or not. It was gorgeous. I heard the door creak open behind me as Leila and Babe slid through the crack and sat down next to me. Loneliness, I don't know the meaning of the word.
I don't need any woman or girlfriend. I had my lady. I hugged Leila around the neck and lay across the cold concrete watching the stars in the sky. It was beautiful out, no light pollution, every star in the sky glistened along with the Milky Way. The flicker of a single shooting star and the hums of the crickets in the background, it was all so peaceful.
"AHHHH" A shriek rang out in the distant. It sounded like a woman. My body twitched with adrenaline and I was tempted to move. Tempted to do something to help, but I didn't. It was not like I did not care. I just did not want to die for someone who may not even be worth saving. Another shriek shattered the night sky. My eyes closed tightly as the shrieks got louder and louder. I felt something surprising touch my face, a tear. It rolled softly down my cheek. I felt its warm salty fluid slide down and finally get lost in my curly hair. Shriek after shriek sound after sound tears fell.
Then, silence.
I left my eyes closed for another few minutes waiting for one final sound one shriek to let me know it was all over. It never came. I was just laying in the darkness with my eyes closed crying over some girl I did not know like a love sick teenager.
I don't even think I was crying because of her but because that meant there was one less. One less living, one less connection, one less human, there is something upsetting about that.
The fire slowly turned to embers as the night dragged on slowly. I was not ready to go inside but I did not want to stay out here. Leila and Babe slept to my left curled up together in a giant ball. My clock rang 3:27 and it was officially bedtime. I found myself on the floor of the Doctors office a large room with a series of desks and computers photos and books. I fashioned a bed out of a pile of dog beds and towels below me and my blanket and pillow. It did not take long for Cleo to plop herself down next to me. I slowly faded into the black and let the unrest of sleep warm my body.
